This blog is the accumulation of lots of craft projects I am working on

Wednesday, December 3, 2014 Christmas is here again!!!

on December 3, 2014

Not sure if others look at this season the way I do but I always do more reflections and contemplating at this time of year and than any others days of the year.  I think maybe it has to do with…happiness…seems my mind wonders to some of the days when I was happier…remembering the good memories is first and if a bad memory comes to mind then it is quickly thrown out of my mind.  I just will not have it there.  I want only brightness and beauty to be here now…so I remember growing up as a child and how Mama and Daddy always tried to the most of their ability to make the season a happy time…and they succeeded way beyond what a child could expect…at least in my eyes.  I remember the huge trees Daddy always brought home after we all went in the woods and found one.  I don’t ever remember their buying one…so it was usually a Georgia pine tree.  The needles on the limbs were so big…but he always got one which was fresh and we usually put the tree up about 1-2 weeks before Christmas…none of that Thanksgiving night decorating. For one thing they were tired that night from all 10 of us children and at least 5 were married and had had children also, being there that day for dinner…another great event as I remember.  I was youngest and not really that much older than some of my nieces and nephews.  I think most of my life has been a fantasy to me anyway ….and sometimes still is…but I tried to see the wonderment of everything.  But anyway back to Christmas.  Daddy always had to trim the tree back some so it would fit in our living room.  It usually took up one whole corner and the room was square.  He would put the lights on and we got to do the other decorating…I got to put a few on there…and I had better not stand back and toss icicles on that tree.  you put them on one by one and hung them just right.  Mama had some wreaths for the window which she had to repair it seems every year.  We had a traditional angel with alight for the top and she had to repair its dress a few times.  We used the same decorations year after year and some were so fascinating to me.  Wish I still had one of those little birds which we clipped on a limb…it had a broom like tail as I remember.  and some may have had feathers not sure I remember them all right as you know I fantasize lots of my child hood.  We had to place each decoration to the best advantageous point…or it would mess up the symmetry of the tree. And no two color lights next to each other.  These were also the days when if one light bulb went out they all did…and these were the bigger bulbs.  It was always a glorious site to me…I would sit in the dark when the lights were on and allow myself to mentally go into a fantasy Christmas land…where Santa was chief honcho…oh how I wanted to meet him and allow him to work his magic on me….Santa was the answer to all of the years heart breaks as far as I was concerned.  He would make everything wonderful in my little world again.  I would get the dolls and cow girl outfit with my holster and guns and maybe a stroller or maybe a yard swing.  And all of these i did get but probably not in the same Christmas…but all of my mind was wrapped in a fantasy of wonderland and magic.  When I became older and my friends all said there was no Santa…I defended him to the most i could.  I told my friends well where would my folks hide 2 bicycles for my 2 brothers and a swing set for me without us seeing it?  Very good question I think as I still have no idea how they got always with it. We had to go to bed early Christmas Eve. And we had better not come out of our room before at least 4-5 o’clock in the morning. I have heard stories that some of my older siblings were so bad wanting to sneak a peek that Mom and Dad had to “tie” there doorknobs to something to keep them from coming out.  But not me as I was a sweet little angel….hummmm…but oh when it was time we could sneak into the living room to see what Santa had left…it was magical…whispering to one another so as not to awake Mama and Daddy.  little did we know my Mama had just got into bed because she usually was sewing clothing for us children Christmas presents or doll clothing…My Mama was something else,  she was a terrific seamstress…and she also loved dolls as i did…so my dolls were always terrific and beautiful…. a little girls dream babies.  We always got one of those huge sticks of peppermint which would last for over a week.  There were always gum drops and chocolate drops and apples and oranges and raisins still on the stems.  Santa was so good to us…he had to be real…and so I convinced myself until I was 12 years old that he was real.  My mother and I were making a bed up one day when i was 12 and somehow the subject of Santa came up…and she made a remark as to how she couldn’t believe I still believed in Santa Claus..  I was shocked…what did she mean?  There had to be a Santa Claus.  I was sure of it…but there it was she was saying there was none… and she could not believe that  I believed there was.  So much for that fantasy..I guess if it was left up to me I would have still believed it.  One year when we had moved to the country for a short year before my Dad got really sick…my bed was in front of a bedroom fireplace and my sisters also slept in the same room as me…and this fireplace was also connected to the chimney from the living room fireplace.  Well there was a brick which was broken and so I could see into the living room…not a big hole but a small one…that year on Christmas eve we had my Mothers Sister and her husband to spend Christmas with us.  So someone had to sleep on the sofa which was in front of the fireplace in the living room.  Well during the night I awoke to hear a ball bounce and roll across the living room floor…so I knew Santa was in the living room putting things under our tree.  And I looked as best I could because there was fire in the fireplace…but I saw something like brown fabric moving in the living room…I just knew it was Santa;s pack with toys in it….so this was something else I used to defend my belief all those years in Santa’s defense as being a real person.  So when my Mama told me there was no Santa all the magic went out of my Christmases until my own children were young and receiving my “Santa toys”. So for me Christmas was a magical time of the year.  So now there are no little ones depending on me to be Santa and the magic has gone.  But my memories will always be a blessing to remember the enchantment when I was young girl.  As I got older and finally came to know what Christmas was really about (not that I didn’t know as a child I did…but not in my heart as I do now) ….Jesus birth into a sinful world which needed redemption in order to fellowship with an Almighty God….now it is a wonderment to me once again…because as an adult I realize how much I needed a redeemer…because without Him I would not have the hope of Glory one day at the end of my life…and i would not have this same Jesus walking beside me in everything I do no matter what…I would not be able to have that “peace that passeth all understanding” in all of life’s situations…and i would not have the weapons needed to fight many a battle which I have fought and will still have to fight before leaving this earth…and so the Christmas decorating is just for my own satisfaction now and since I do not need lots of satisfaction as I grow older then the decorating is less. So this is for that small need to remind me to remember….days gone by and people who are no longer with me on this earth…just one small tree for my dolls and me.


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